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Porn: Blight or Benefit?

by Beth Divine 28 Dec 2017

Is watching porn bad for your sex life? People have claimed that porn can become an addiction, that watching too much porn kills your sex drive, and that it leads people to have unrealistic expectations of their partners, leading to arguments and break-ups.

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The truth is more complicated than a black and white ‘good or bad’ scenario. If a relationship is in trouble and this causes one of the partners to seek out porn to get relief and enjoy some escapism, then the relationship might possibly be further divided. If one partner has an abhorrence towards porn – which happens surprisingly often, even in these more liberated days – then any instance of watching porn (or being caught watching porn) could lead to fights and a possible separation. Finally, if one party does get a crush on a particular porn star (which, again, happens surprisingly often!) this can also cause comparisons with the life partner, leading to friction and fights. These are just a couple of the ways in which porn can have a negative effect on a personal life: and now you know, you know what to look out for to prevent it impacting your life poorly.

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However – now the better news! – there is no need for porn to be anything but a blessing to your sex life. People tend to be much more relaxed about porn, being aware that just because their partner enjoys watching sex, including some unusual and quite hardcore actions, it does not necessarily mean that there is a problem with their mutual sex life; just as your partner occasionally masturbating does not mean that there is anything wrong with you, it is just a moment of solo satisfaction to satisfy a need, much like scratching an itch!#

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Watching porn can teach people to be more open and adventurous with each other. While it is hard to articulate exactly what one wants in bed, it can become easier while watching a porn film to say, ‘I like that,’ ‘That looks like fun,’ or even, ‘I really hate that.’ In this way, you can learn about each other – and even discover what you personally do or do not like.

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Finally, watching porn can help you to find new things to try. Imagine a world with no oral sex – and then the discovery of it, how it would open up a whole world of physical pleasure to those who have only ever known, for example, missionary position sex!

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Sex is a basic need in humans – we desire it: maybe not every day or even every week, but go too long without sex and it becomes an all-consuming craving – but it is also something that we, almost uniquely, actually enjoy doing too. Few other animals have sex for fun, but humans have literally made it into an art form.

So why not enjoy watching porn, whether alone or with a partner. You are, after all, merely obeying a primal directive!