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Sexting – for New Couples

by Beth Divine 12 May 2019

Sexting tends to make headlines every now and then, usually for the wrong reasons. But sexting between consenting partners who are respectful of and wildly in love with each other can be a fantastic relationship tool. However, there are steps to sexting and no stranger should immediately send nudes to someone they would like to get to know; except in vary rare cases, this will instantly destroy any chance of a romance! However, at the other end of the scale, sexting between established lovers who know their partners inside and out (almost literally!) can be very graphic and explicit, pressing buttons that the sender knows are there to be pressed!

Sexting can be the exchange of flirtatious banter and text, the sending of risqué images and emojis and it can include the sending of nude photographs. Here are some tips on how far you should go and at what point in your relationship you should do so.

When you first meet and see that the other is also as interested in you as you are in them it is a great time. Getting to know each other is wonderful, especially as you find out all the things that you have in common and learn each other’s likes and dislikes. If this is a relationship that you both want to last, as opposed to a quick down and dirty hook-up (which is also fine, but not quite in the same league as a fixed relationship) then you will want to take things slowly. At this stage, any communications should be very innocent: compliments about hair and outfits, expressing the desire to spend more time together, maybe the merest hint of the attraction you feel for each other. If you are certain that this partner might be ‘the one’ do not worry about taking it slow: you will (hopefully) have time to linger at each stage of the relationship, instead of rushing into anything that you might later regret.

Getting to know each other over dates: meals at restaurants, taking in a movie or two, going for long walks while you just talk and talk, does eventually give way to the desire to step things up to the next level. It is at this point that you can both become a bit more explicit with your messages, with outright references to, for example, fantastic boobs, a great bum, and a longing to explore further. Emojis are a great and unthreatening way to express sexual desire for the other person, and is not personal enough that the other partner will feel that they are snubbing you should they need a little more time to get to the same point.

If you do exchange photographs at this stage, they should be portraits or fully clothed images. Apart from anything else, you do not yet know them well enough to trust them with a permanent record of your naked body!